So many thoughts….mostly what does it mean to be happy? Why are my feelings for Clint so closely tied to the feelings I have about God? Why am I so surprised that he fails me? Where did my idealism come from? Why is it so hard for me to say I’m sorry? Why do I always need to win? Even though I believe in the sovereignty of God, why do I constantly strive for control as though it were possible? Why am I so addicted to my pride? Will things ever get better? Is there any real hope to be had?
“I know what he appoints is best, and murmur at it still.
Help my unbelief
My help must come from thee”
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4 comments:
liz - as lame as this response may be, my response to this post is: "sigh"
yeah, that's about all you can say you know?
I hope you don't think this is strange, but I've been reading some of your posts and I'm convinced we should be friends. OK, it is weird, but every single question you asked in this post has been lingering in my mind for months, maybe years now. My comment is a paraphrase from a C. S. Lewis book... when we see our creator face to face, his beauty and his love for us will be so astounding that to all of our questions ..."I know now, Lord, why you utter no answer. You are yourself the answer. Before your face questions die away."
-en
i dont' think that's weird at all! i totally read people's blogs that i don't know. feel free to comment at will.
and about the c.s.lewis quote- i long for the day when all of my doubt, my sin, my questions, this world are all swallowed up in Jesus. i'm pretty sick of it all.
Good quote.
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